


Here Without You

by bornonthewrongside



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, F/M, Sadness, feels will break, song prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-23
Updated: 2015-01-23
Packaged: 2018-03-08 17:30:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3217550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bornonthewrongside/pseuds/bornonthewrongside
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is work #2 of my song prompts, <br/>the song was Here Without You! </p>
<p>i hope you enjoy reading & of course let me know what you think!</p>
    </blockquote>





	Here Without You

**Author's Note:**

> This is work #2 of my song prompts,   
> the song was Here Without You! 
> 
> i hope you enjoy reading & of course let me know what you think!

The stretch of highway seemed to go on for miles as Sandor stared blankly ahead of him. Sandor left before the sun had even risen, and now it blinded him as he drove. His old pickup bumped along the poorly maintained road, and groaned as he increased speed even further above the speed limit. Trees lined the highway on one side, and a large river ran on the other. The sun created a glittering cascade of diamonds on its water, seeming to mock Sandor.

Sandor’s scarred face was set in an emotionless state, and his grey eyes were covered with aviator sunglasses. He had already been driving for two hours, and he still had an hour more. The sun was causing him to sweat in his completely black outfit. The rolled down windows allowed the wind to rip his dark hair across his face, and allowed him to breathe. He glanced over at the passenger seat to see a bouquet of bright flowers. They sat where she was supposed to.

The flowers had a dash of blue that reminded him of her eyes, and the red roses were so close to the color of her hair. He remembered the last time he saw her pretty face; her Tully blue eyes were glistening, her hair was braided down her back, and her smile put the sun to shame. He closed his eyes for a moment, and he could see her saying his name with a mischievous smirk.  

The blaring of a horn pushed him into reality, and he quickly swerved back into his lane. His chest heaving as he breathed in deeply; he tried to keep his hands from shaking as he tightened his grip on the steering wheel. He wiped his eyes to get rid of the tears that had escaped while he was lost in thought. Sandor refused to let his mind drift off as he continued on this seemingly endless stretch of highway.

When the highway finally started to curve, he saw the small unmarked road that held the small cemetery that his beautiful little bird was resting in. Slowly, he turned into the road, and suddenly he was immersed in shadows. The canopy of trees blocked out any direct sunlight. This road twisted and curved, but Sandor knew it like the back of his scarred hand. When he saw the sign for the cemetery, he turned on his blinker.

The truck creaked as Sandor pressed on brake to turn into the lonely cemetery. A tall iron gate was open to reveal the endless rows of headstones. They varied in shapes and sizes; some stood towering over others, and others were modest and lay close to the cold ground. Trees were scattered among the graves, creating shadows throughout.

Sandor slowly stood from his truck, and stretched his long legs. He ran his hands through his hair, and took off his sunglasses. He squinted at the new brightness, and looked around him as his eyes adjusted. No other cars were parked nearby, and Sandor was thankful for it. He reached back into his truck, grabbed the bright bouquet of flowers, and a quickly scribbled letter. He closed the door with a slam, and locked the doors.

He stood at the opening of a gravel path, a path he’s walked twice already. Foot prints could be made out, but none of them were fresh. He looked down at his feet, willing them to move. But they didn’t. He started at them intently; he just needed to start walking.

He looked around him once more, and breathed in deeply. With his hands shaking, he stepped forward once, then twice. He walked briskly down one row, another, another, and another. The headstones blurred together as he focused on one particular spot.

As he walked, his pace slowed to a stop until he reached the Stark’s plot. It was in the back corner of the cemetery, and was secluded from the rest. With unsteady steps, he walked past Eddard Stark, Catelyn Stark, and Robb Stark. He was only here to see his little bird.

Her headstone was modest; a small pillar that was light blue. It didn’t reach Sandor’s knee. It read, “Sansa Stark; 1993-2014; Beloved daughter, sister, and friend.”

_Lover_ , Sandor thought to himself, _Beloved lover_. He lowered himself to his knees, and set the bouquet of flowers against the headstone. Breathing in unsteadily, he smiled at the picture of her that was still leaning against the headstone. She was laughing, as she often was.

“Sansa, Little Bird,” Sandor licked his lips. “It’s been 100 days, since the last time I saw you. And you’re still in my mind, my lonely mind. When I close my eyes, you’re all I see. I can still feel your soft skin under my rough hands. I can still hear your laugh from three rooms away.”

He raked his hands over his face. Tears were threatening to pour, but he bit them back. _I need to let her know_.  “When I dream at night, nothing changed. You’re still here, telling me how stupid I’m being, or how much you love me. Sansa, we’re still happy. But everytime I wake up, I am reminded that you’re not here. You won’t be wrapped up in my arms, or in the living room reading your favorite book. I’m reminded that you aren’t here anymore. And I can’t help but think, life is overrated without you.”

Tears dripped slowly down Sandor’s cheeks, and his hands shook as he opened the letter. When he tried to speak again, he choked on his words. He doubled over as the sobs racked throughout his whole body. He couldn’t stop it from happening, whenever he tried to breathe he would let out a cry. He pounded the ground with his fist, _I need my little bird. I need her in my life._

He tried to stop for what seemed like a lifetime, but it was no use. He closed his eyes, and just pictured her next to him. Placing her soft hand on his back, whispering in his ear, kissing his scarred cheek; that was all he wanted.

He inhaled deeply, taking in the scent of the dewy grass. He planted his palms against the dampened ground, and pushed himself up to look at her simple headstone. His eyes were swollen, and his tongue was as thick as tar.

“I’m here without you, but you’re still on my lonely mind.” He wiped his eyes, and breathed in once again. “Sansa, my beautiful Sansa. I know, I need to, I… I found this letter. I found it in the bottom of your desk drawer. I read it. I know I shouldn’t have, I know, you would be chastising me right now, if you were still alive, but you’re not. So I did.”

He ripped open the letter, and attempted to smile. “I forgot about it. I wrote it to you while I was drunk. When I convinced myself you were going to leave me. Leave me for a better man, leave me because you realized what kind of man I was. You kept it for over a year.  Oh, my little bird, my sweet dove. You were too good for me.”

On the outside of the envelope, in her beautiful cursive, was written, _“Read when you want to give up.”_

__

Tentatively, with shaking hands, he set the wrinkled paper next her photo and the flowers. “I’ll leave it here with you. That way you don’t forget how much I love you.”

Slowly Sandor stood, his joints creaking. As he stood to his full height, a small red bird land on her headstone. A sad smile spread across his thin lips, “You’re still with me in my dreams. Right little bird? That’s what you would say. You would say, the gods will bring us back together. They’ll smile upon our love, and they’ll make sure we’re together. So tonight, when I lay my head down, I’ll keep that in mind. Because, tonight it’s only you and me. Goodbye, Little Bird.”

He turned to walk back towards the gravel pave. When he turned his back to have just one last glance, he could have sworn he saw her sitting against the headstone, laughing as she held the letter close to her heart.

**  
“I love you always, Little Bird.”**


End file.
